Things my Father told me.

My dad has the advantage of having numerous t-shirts in the ‘been there, done that’ category. I would do well to pay more attention to the advice he has given me over the years. Here are some of his nuggets of wisdom that have stuck with me – even if I haven’t always followed them when I should. My navigation of office politics or life in general would have been much smoother if I had.

  • To be seen as just as good as the boys, you have to be better than the boys.
    • I strive to do this. Probably the only place I consistently succeed is playing computer games. Unfortunately, this is coupled with being a rather graceless winner.
  • For once in your life, keep your head down and your mouth shut!
    • Father brought me up to be outspoken, and to question everything, and this does run counter to that. However, not every situation is helped by speaking my mind. Sometimes, I do need to just shut up. I’ll work on that.
  • You’re responsible for your own happiness.
    • I sometimes forget this. In a bad situation? It’s up to me to get out of it. There is no knight in shining armour waiting to save me, so I’d better get up and slay that dragon myself.
  • Don’t be a victim.
    • Sometimes, it’s too easy to wallow in self pity. In times when I’ve been depressed, I wish I’d kept this at the front of my mind.
  • You don’t give offense. You *take* offense.
    • Nothing is more annoying than someone who *looks* to take offense. Although the main thing that has happened as a result of taking this on board is that I find people more annoying.
  • Stop cutting off your nose to spite your face!
    • I’m a stubborn person. I don’t think this will change. Oops.

I think that will do for now. There are plenty more, but it would likely turn into a book. I guess the point of this post is that all the above pieces of advice, if I’d chosen to follow them throughout life more consistently, would have improved so many rubbish situations I’ve managed to land myself in. Make no mistake – the common denominator in all of my problems past and present is me.

I should probably listen to my Dad more. Even if he is leaving all the money to the cat.

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3 thoughts on “Things my Father told me.

  1. I have a different perspective to offer. Your sentance “…. would have improved so many rubbish situations I’ve managed to land myself in.” Is not strictly accurate. You haven’t willingly chosen to be in negative situations, you have unwittingly allowed other people to put you there.

    Did you spot a bad situation, think “ooouu goodie I’m gonna have some of that!”, and then decide to jump and “land” right in the middle of it? NO! Of course you didn’t!! What happens is other humans decide for one reason or another to create a negative situation around you, circling like sharks ready to attack. We don’t often recognise what is happening until it’s too late, thus making us feel we are in the middle of a huge pile of, to be polite, self induced stinking rotting compost.

    Don’t allow yourself to be “landed” where you don’t want to be. You are not responsible for other people’s inflated ego’s or lack of self esteem, so swat them away next time they start buzzing round. From now on coat yourself in some teflon so all the crap thrown at you slides off back to the shit throwers. Let these people jog on and have a shit slinging party amongst themselves. As for you, continue to be yourself. 😛

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Very true! However, I do have to take responsibility for getting out of the situation once I land in it. I guess that’s part of the point! I can’t expect the world to make me happy, so I need to seek out happiness for myself. Be that getting into a new situation, or just changing my own outlook 🙂

    Like

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